23 years ago, when I was accepted into the MBA program at Queen's University in Ontario, Canada, I applied to live at International House, a 10-bedroom house that the University designated as housing for 10 female post-graduate students - 5 Canadian and 5 international students.
Queen's MBA - one of the most sought after MBA programs in Canada - was an exhilarating experience in itself.
But 23 years down the line, I can say without reservation that living at International House was one of the most profound experiences of my life.
For 2 years, I was privileged to be housemates with 9 amazing women who were pursuing Master's or PhD degrees in Business, Law, Arts, Sciences, Medicine, Physical Therapy and Computer Science.
Talk about diversity! My housemates included Janewa from Ghana/Canada, Medha from India, Bilkiss from Mauritius, Angela (also my coursemate) from Hong Kong/Canada, Satomi from Japan, Diana from Palestine/Canada, Hwee Hwee from Singapore, Noorshina from Canada/Uganda/England,Christine from Eastern Canada Yan from Hong Kong/Canada and several more wonderful ladies. Wendy from Hong Kong/Canada was coursemates with Angela and me, and visited frequently.
International House could have so easily become "Faction House", with housemates divided along the lines of politics, religion, ethnicity etc, etc, etc. But we got along beautifully! Note, I didnt say perfectly.
I can confidently say that during my time at International House, each housemate came in with an open mind and open heart. We truly sought to learn about each other and to get along.
I introduced my housemates to jollof rice and kelewele, while I learned to love sushi and dimsum and buk choy.
There was never a dull moment at International House. On any given day, I would come home from class and my evenings could be spent as follows: I might go with medical student Noorshina to the gym to get work-out tips. Or I might have Angela teach me accounting. Or listen, spellbound to Diana or Janewa, now both outstanding lawyers, as they discussed pertinent issues of the times. Or be inspired by Biology PhD student Hweehwee's pragmatic wisdom. Or be awed at how Satomi, a Japanese diplomat, juggled her course load with work. Or maybe just all of us hanging out together while Medha, made us made the most delectable-tasting cardimum/cinnamon tea. Medha found the time to mother us all, while keeping up with her busy teaching load at the School of Computing and finishing up her PhD thesis!
Every day was special at International House. And I believe it was because WE had the right attitudes. The reality was that was too much diversity among us housemates for us to conceivably have agreed on everything.
But WE made it work. How I wish that Queen's University International House, 1993-95, was a microcosm of our world today!!
Please hear me out. I don't claim to have all the answers to the world's complex problems.
But what I am saying is that WE ALL have a part to play.
Technology has transformed our world. The power of Social Media allows global breaking news to reach any of us within minutes. And even live in real time!
There are many benefits. We get to enjoy events and celebrate accomplishments taking place thousands of miles away.
And because people are literally getting caught with their pants down, pictorial and video evidence may make it easier to nab people and to hold them accountable for their actions.
But I also see a dangerous trend taking hold and reaching fever pitch:
1. Tragic News Overload.
2. Intolerant, Inaccurate, Insulting, Bigoted Commentary Exposure Overload.
People have no filter on social media. I think it has become worse since the advent of apps like Periscope and FB Live.
Listen, over-exposure to news of tragic events and bigoted commentary affects all of us. But the less mentally-stable among us ARE LITERALLY breaking down! They cannot handle feelings of being judged, or ostracized or treated unfairly. Or they buy into sentiments that make them feel justified to judge or ostracize others or kill others. Then they begin to see themselves as some kind of messiah for their cause.
These people do not have the coping skills to deal with their fear and anger and resentment. They are unable to put it into any kind of rational perspective.
So, acting alone, they buy arms and bombs. Horrifically killing large crowds of people.
Or, acting alone, they drive trucks into a large crowd of innocent bystanders. Horrifically killing large crowds of people.
A few months ago, I innocently followed a FB link to the profile of a man who used the word 'nigger' in EVERY single one of his vile FB posts. I would rather not describe the rage that welled up within me when I read them.
My point? We are all entitled to our opinions. BUT PLEASE, be responsible and respectful with how you express yourself on social media.
Your mindless comment could unfortunately be the straw that breaks the camel's back.
Your mindless comment could trigger a mentally ill person to commit atrocities.
Every tragedy in the world is our collective tragedy.
It is OUR world.
